I ate a Peter Pan Peanut Butter sandwich tonight. I did it for art (not Art). I did it for drama! It was done to feel the full throttle of adventure and risk flowing through my veins!!!
If I don’t survive the night, please insure that the following is carried out.
These are my last wishes:
Send my Kegerator to John in Grand Cayman. Use my FedEx discount before they lock me out of the system.
Give my fishtanks to Novie (she’s better at fish than…someone else…ah-hem).
Give my truck to the first homeless person you can find with a drivers license.
Let Rob and Blake have a mud wrestling match to determine who gets my camera gear.
Give my hair clippers to Viv. I want him to look sharp (read bald) at my funeral.
I saw on the news tonight that Peter Pan has a recall for peanut butter that may have salmonella. I have two jars of Peter Pan because everyone knows that only dweezles and freakazoids, and “mom’s” choose Jiff, and the cooooool kids all eat Peter Pan!!!. Why two , the clever reader may ask? Crunchy and smooth of course! Sometimes I feel like a…nevermind. Anyway, both of my jars of the creamy goodness were at least a few months old, and I didn’t think there was any real chance of them being affected by the recall. My local newscaster guided me through the process of determining if my life was in danger. The key to the mystery was to check the lid and look for the product number, and if it started with 2111, it might be a good idea to write a last will and testament in preparation for the pending demise. It would probably be an even better idea not to eat the peanut butter.
Chunky…..
Smooth…..
2111
Both were 2111 product codes.
I’m pretty sure I’m not going to die. At least not tonight, and probably not ever from peanut butter. If I do die, I at least will have killed myself because I was trying to get some goofy pics for this ridiculous blog. If I survive until morning I’ll toss the peanut butter and send in the lids for some cold hard cash, as advised to do so on Peter’s website. You can find more info about the recall on ConAgra’s website. If you don’t have any of the bogus peanut butter, I hope you also don’t have any of ConAgra’s stock!
ConAagra’s page
Can you guys look at this picture and not want to sing????
Damn! I think we got Peter Pan peanut butter here to.
And oh yeah, funny pics. Odd but funny. And not funny like “my name is Earl” funny. Funny like “Reno 911″.
I haven’t watched much Reno 911 yet… but Earl is good stuff (and Jaime Presley is a stone cold goddess. Wow, I was about to post a link to google image search for her name……but she’s… um…. well she’s pretty naked in a lot of the pics and I don’t want to get anyone in trouble.
How have you been Drag? Still in El Paso? Call me soon!
And what have we learned from the peanut butter debacle? That Wal-Mart brand peanut butter is cheaper and the exact same thing as Peter Pan peanut butter. Bring on the savings!!!